Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Farewell to You

So the time has come to say good bye to the year 2009. It was a good year to me – it was actually just the way I wanted it to be: stable event-wise, but rich in new emotions and feelings. I will miss so many things about this year: songs that made me feel sad, warm Florida air during my vacation, people that walked away from me into a new life. I will miss being 29 – that last chance to be in my twenties and refer to myself as a “girl”. I am learning to live with a new concept of being a woman: I am supposed to be wiser, more mature and more feminine. I am supposed to be stronger too – but I don’t know about that. Sometimes I feel like new experiences only make me more vulnerable and prompt me to shut people out and hide deeper inside. I learned to appreciate solitude and silence.

I lived with dignity and determination through the biggest challenge of the year. I didn’t let the emotions take over – and the outcome was exactly right, I came out totally innocent from the story in which I could have been almost a criminal. Even if I hurt someone it was totally unintentional and I made everything in my power not to let things go too far. I had my closure and I am hoping to be able to let it go completely in a new year. This story is over. Even though my mind and my heart keep going back to it, it’s totally over. Period. No roll-over. No continuation. Farewell to you.

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